Dear Anonymous commenter

Recently I received the following comment on my May 13, 2010 post “Common sense has left the building“:

“The narcissistic person is marked by a grandiose self-image, a constant need for admiration, and a general lack of empathy for others…”

The comment was left by “Anonymous”. I don’t know who this person is. They could be the person who I discovered is a perpetual victim with anger issues and summarily said “buh bye” to back in March/April. They could be the individual with the profile name “MrAssMan69” [seriously…that’s his username…and no, I didn’t look at his profile…he showed up in the list of people that visited my profile] who I’ve been making fun of for the past week [how can I not with a profile name like that? how could he think that was a good idea?!?]. Anonymous could be one of several petty individuals I know who like to leave anonymous comments on people’s blogs because they think it’s funny to either attempt to piss them off or leave nasty/judgmental comments just to be mean (as both mean people and mean-spirited actions).

At any rate, I do not know who they are. Anonymous commenter did not provide an email. This leads me to believe that they are too much of a coward to engage in dialogue related to their comment.

So since Anonymous hasn’t left me a means of contacting them or responding privately, I’m choosing to respond to their comment publicly in this post.

Dear Anonymous,

Your comment lacks context. Who is the narcissistic person you are referring to? The people who participate in online dating? Myself for having some expectations? Are you attempting to judge me? Judge online dating in general?

Because if it’s me, well, pardon me for expecting someone that’s using an online dating site to actually want to get to know me as a person. You know, to DATE. As in pursue a relationship with. It’s kind of hard to do that unless you take some time to actually get to know someone. To that end, I have expectations (as detailed in the post cited above and summarized here):

  • Expectations that someone might actually read my profile before contacting me.
  • Expectations and hopes that they might actually be going into this with the same genuine intent I am and aren’t just looking for casual sex.
  • Expectations that they might want to get to know ME and not some fantasy.
  • Expectations that they are representing themselves honestly and to the best of their ability by taking some time on their own profile.

If I’m the narcissistic one for having expectations, well fine. I don’t think my expectations are all that unreasonable or even narcissistic by your definition given that this is about trying to date people.

So, Anonymous, care to weigh in? Provide some context? Reveal your identity and own what you’re saying instead of hiding behind the safety wall of anonymity? It’s not like this is a 12 step program where anonymity is critical to create a safe environment for people seeking help. This is a blog for goodness sake. A blog on the internet.

Also, care to cite the source of your definition?

Looking forward to hearing from you to continue the dialogue.



About slmcdanold

I’m learning to laugh at myself on a daily basis. I’m a librarian (cataloger) and I love it. My job involves all things metadata related in any and all formats. I have been known to cause a ruckus when necessary (aka troublesome cataloger) and make no apologies for it. I have a passion for continuing education and teaching. I’m a newbie coder (still learning). I like to cook. I’m a fan of rugby (go Australian Wallabies!) and ice hockey (go Detroit Red Wings!). I’m car-free and bike/walk a lot. I’m learning to love running one stride at a time. I own (and love) a very mouthy cat with a punk attitude and a slightly neurotic rescue mutt.
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One Response to Dear Anonymous commenter

  1. Dating says:

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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